My Portion

"My strength and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever."

Recently,
I was not myself lately.
I do not know why but what I did,
what I act is totally different from what I usually do.

I knew what I did was wrong and I felt sad,
dissapointed because of my selfishness of keep thinking more on me than God.
I should not let these things control over me and change me from who I really am.

Instead,

I only want God to be the one controling my life!

So from now on,
I throw all my unwanted luggage from the past and renew my heart, renew my soul and renew my life to God.

Because You are the only one I needed most in my life and nothing else.

You are a great friend who always makes people around you feel warm and happy.
The way you show your kindness to others.
The way you laugh and jokes around with your friends.
The way you smile while your eyes sparkles in delight.
But most of all,
The way you always pour out your heart and soul to God with everlasting love and always faithful to Him.

As Im going to leave you soon,
even though you are my joy, my despair in the same time,
Im glad I could meet a person like you in my life.
I always look up to you and I hope you will always remain the same as you are which everyone loves including myself.
I wish you all the best in your future
and hope you will always enjoy your journey with God and live happily with your love ones.

Take care, my dear freind.

Last month,
29/4/2012 (Sun),

is the day that my awesome youth group from GBC (Georgetown Baptist Chruch)
were having a 412 movie outing together at Gurney Plaza after finish Sunday church service thanks to Ps Daniel.

And do you know what movie are we watching that day?

3,2,1

Tada! Its The Avengers! xD



I was so lucky I have the chance to watch this movie.
My mom keep persisting me not to watch this movie with my church friends because of my knee.
But thanks to my best friend Adeline,
my mom finally gave up on me and letting me off the hook.
All thanks to Adeline :D thank you so much!

Before I leave the house she yelled at me:

"Tian, dont let me hear from you broke another of your ACL (Anterior Cruciate Ligament) again!
Mommy is not going to responsible to take care of you twice again in the hospital.
Do you hear me!
You are gonna regret this for not listinning to mommy!"

I was a little annoyed and said to her like most teenagers do,
"Yeah yeah, what ever you say mom sheesh.."
But I know she say this out of love :)

I was glad Adeline and Nian Zle help me a lot in this movie outing,
in return God gave us a special parking space (OKU) specially for us
thanks to me kekekee ;D

I was happy about this movie outing,
not just because it was my 1st going outside after two weeks from my knee surgery,
but be able to see Adeline, Nian Zle and my church friends again after two weeks dint see each other.

A lot of my friends was surprise when they saw me in a wheelchair from Adeline's grandmother.
Some wishes me good luck on my recovery,
some friends wanted to play with me in wheelchair for fun,
especially my little brother who thinks me as a racing car,
speeding away which makes me feel dizzy.
Also another cheeky freind of mine jokingly said something weird to me and to the ticket takers while pushing me to the cinema. (I was kinda embarassed and quickly told them he's my brother)
I dont know why I reacted like this but Im glad thats over. Phew!

When entering the cinema,
I was having a hard time at first when it comes to reaching for my seat  (disadvantage for people in wheelchair)
But thanks to two of the strongest boys in my church group
Max and Sean carrying me to my seat.
Because of both of them, I was able to watch the movie properly.
So I thank them and felt grateful for what they did. :)
Im also glad my little sis, Rou could seat next to me cause she scared Im lonely. Awwwww

The Avengers was just amazing!
Its a movie which excites me most besides movies like V for Vendetta or How to Train a Dragon.

I love Hulk the most among all characters in the Avengers.
My friends think Im werid cause most people would choose Thor or Captain America cause they are buff and super cute.
But not me,
Hulk is just super awesome!
I love the way he keeps smashing bad guy's butts.
I laugh till I cry especially the part when the Hulk keeps smash Loki into pieces on Stark tower.
So damn funny xD

The movie outing turns out to be a sucess!
I could not have the chance to watch this movie if it wasnt for my friends :D
I thank God I be able to safely join my church group for this movie outing.
I was having a fun time hanging out with them and
I will never forget this moment in my life! :)
Hope my church could do organise more activities like this.
I cant w8 for this to happen again~

                              This picture is a group pic of me in wheelchair with my awesome friends.
                                                                     Love you guys always!
                                                                      GBC 412 Rocks! xD







Mom, Dad.

I can't wait to see you guys this coming Wednesday after 5 days of absents in our house.

Its so quiet without you guys.

Mom,
a fun person who loves to tease me
and always compare with me see who is younger and prettier.
(Aiya Im still always better than you Mom haha, just kidding! ;D )

Dad,
my mentor who always gives great advise especially when it comes to the word of God
and sometimes crack some jokes to make us laugh out loud.

I love you two and I really miss you guys so much.

God please protect my parent from this trip and safely return to Penang.

Hope my parent are having a great time there.

PS: Please come back earlier so that I wont continue become Rou and Song's "Ah Mat" (Driver)
      Sigh...so tiring to drive them both --

God,
Please help me to always keep running after you Lord instead of running to the other side.
Because everytime Im getting nearer to you,
Satan will always there to stop me.

So please God,
continue to protect me and lend me your strength to overcome this
so that I could finish the race with you Lord.

You and only you.

Hey peeps,
its been a while since I post something on my blog.
I just finish my knee surgery one month ago and my knee never felt better.

First of all,
I wanted to thank all my family and friends who had pray for me and took their time to visit me during my stay in the hospital.
I was touched by them when they always encourage me to get better soon.
But most of all I thank God and Jesus Christ for being there for me whenever Im in my happiest or darkest moments of my life,
I will always appreciate it in my heart.

Anyway,
It has been 9 months now since I accidentally fell down from a friendly match of frisbee
and tear down my ACL completely on my left knee.
I still remember that very day,
when I could not even stand cause it was too painful to endure.
The great pain on my knee nearlly cause me fainted onto the ground.

When I reach back to my house, I ate some painkillers which my parent brough from a Phramacy shop.
I though I could ease the pain at least  for a night to prepare myself to college.
But unfortunately, luck is not on my side.
It seems like Im allergic to this painkiller (Sodium Dichrolofinac) -.-
In the end, I ended up not just an injured knee
but my whole face became swollen including my nasal passage.

I could not open my eyes and having a hard time breathing for the whole night.
My family felt sorry for me so I try to smile to cheer them up.
In the end my whole family laugh so hard because my facial expression with my puffy face was too funny .
Im glad they could laugh again :)
It took me 4 days to end this problem.
So ever since then I never touch a painkiller again even after my knee surgery on April 2012.
I rather bare the pain than having another swollen face again.

These 3 pictures below I have taken it last year August 2011 after eating this stupid painkiller D:

                                                       1, 2,3 Cheeseeee hehe ;)

                                                        My blurr face hahaha xD

Tada! My face after eating painkiller.


In the beginning I was having a hard time to accept this
because I really wanted to run again.
In the meantime I'm scared to do surgery.

I remember I cried while painfully dragging my injured knee to my bed.

I sadly told this to God:
"Why! Why this has to happens to me?
What did I do wrong?"

I think most people would think the same thing as me in the beginning:
Like:
Why God allow people around us to suffer?
It dint seems fair.
Or maybe
Why God alows it to happens?
Does He really care for us?

But after praying for a long time
and hearing testimonies from brothers and sisters of Christ who experiece more suffering,
my mind changed
and finally know the reason why God want me and everyone to experience suffering.

I believe the reason He wanted to let me and all of us
to experience suffering is mostly because
He is testing OUR FAITH in Him.
Also to be honest to myself,
I believe is also because I had live a disobedient life for the pass few months before the accident occurs.
God just wanted to show how He really cares about me by giving me a warning earlier
so that I could learn my lesson and not to repeat the same mistake again in my life.

Therefore,
I never regret that God give me this accident.
Because compare to other people's problems,
mine was just nothing and Im grateful for that.
Im just glad that my life is always full of surprises and
more meaningful to look forward thanks to God.
Right now Im living a good life and I cant wait to experience my University life in Kuala Lumpur.and getting my knee better from walking to running. :D

Before I end this message,
I pray for the people who are suffering right now that they could always depend on God instead of depend on yourself.
He will give strength to the people who are weary and heals the broken hearted.

Remember,

God doesn't ENJOY seeing anyone suffer,
but He does ALLOW people to suffer for various reasons.

He wanted you to always trust Him
and have Faith in Him no matter what happens in your life.

Suffering does not makes people weak,
but makes people stronger to keep moving forward.

                                                    

                                                                             Lastly,

                                                                            SMILE
                                                             and keep moving forward :)


                                                                             -END-


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Ktian
My name is KT,Leo, Foodie, Wanderlust and a Dreamer. My love: Friends, Family, God. Welcome to my blog!
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